What we did not learn in school
B’H
What we did not learn in school
“We do not receive wisdom, we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us or spare us”. Marcel Proust.
When we were is school we learned how to read, to write, to memorize poems, grammatical rules, data, lots of dates, lots of places, lots of people’s names and latter, lots of formulas. We learned to share, not to speak in class, to control our bowels in class, to focus in class or to adapt using different techniques if we were not able to concentrate in class.
Our lives were organized by many rules. We learned to obey those rules and we learned the consequences of not following them.
But, one thing was missing from the curriculum: how to live.
So, life became and stayed our main school of learning. Life is a persistent teacher. It will repeat a lesson till it is well learned. How does life know when the lesson is learned? When we change our behavior. If we only know it, but we have not changed, life remains in session.
Doing:
We are moving creatures. We are always doing something. When we are not doing something, we are thinking about doing something, which is doing.
We are always rearranging the world. Always put something in nature, or taking it away. Mr. Hack was a wealthy man. He asked his gardener to take out some trees, plant others somewhere else, put a pond with flowers, a brick path with benches on the way. When his best friend came to visit him, Mr. Hack took him to his garden. He said "That is the way the world would have been, if only God had enough money".
Our doing allows learning. The more we learn, the more we understand, the more we can do and the more we can enjoy.
Positive lessons do not always come in positive ways.
If you get a flat tire in a deserted road, it can teach you: acceptance, the value of planning, anticipating, patience, the joy of service, gratitude for being of service.
You can use the same flat tire to learn, or relearn a depressing lesson: life is not fair, nothing can be trusted, life is a pain, things do not work the way we plan them. We find out that life is not structured like a class. In life we pick up what we want to learn and leave the rest for another opportunity.
Who is the teacher in life?
If you listen carefully, you will hear the voice of your inner teacher.
It is not the loudest voice in there, but it is the most consistent, patient and persistent one.
Try an experiment:
Scan your body from head to feet. HOw does it feel? Are you tired or alert?
Look at your emotions. What are you feeling now? Excitement, fear, calmness. Feelings are felt around the center of the chest and the stomach.
Notice your thoughts,. What are you thinking? Listen to the chatter for a moment.
Who noticed the body, felt the feelings and observed the mind?
I believe it was you. Who are you?
Why do we resist learning?
We usually forget easily positive experiences, but the negative ones, find their way to engrave themselves in our memory, for a very long time. When a child hears, don't, stop, shouldn't, bad boy, shame on you. This child believes he is destined for failure. He goes to school looking for a savior, only to find himself etching that image even deeper. The child has to compete for grades, for friends, for popularity and excel in sports.
We were growing plagued with rules: wake up early, brush your teeth, clean your shoes, make up your bed. Some rules were useful, others were not. Some rules are absolute, others are arbitrary.
Here I produced a list of good rules:
· Love your neighbor as yourself
· Take care of yourself
· Use everything for your upliftment, learning and growth
· keep a record of your progress
If you are growing, learning and trying new things, expect mistakes. They are a natural part of a learning process. To avoid situations in order to avoid mistakes would be the worst mistake of all.
We learn by doing. Even if we fail repeatedly, there are learning lessons.
What do you want to do, why?
What is your purpose. Your purpose is discovered because you already have a purpose. Once you have it, keep it for yourself as you compass in life.
When you say you want a healthy body, religious life, a career, money; it is method to get something else: security, energy, satisfaction, love, knowledge of God, inner peace.
Life is the school. We have in us our teacher. The lessons in life are loud. Our inner voice is quiet. We have records of other voices that speak louder, like parents, teachers, other authority telling us what should or should not be doing.
The message that we keep getting is that we should accept the things the way they are, accept ourselves the way we are and then, find ways of changing our character traits, and then, find ways of changing the things we can change. Everything in nature is always changing, day and night, bird's migrations, people migrations, all goods migrating from one place to another. So, in this go and come, va et viens, we will act upon our place, our purpose, our life.
Estela Sasson
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